Sister's wedding 2

My wee sister finally got married. She's been living with her now husband for about 11 years now I think. I hate weddings. I hate churches. I hate religion. But most of all I hate wedding receptions. I tried hard but I just couldn't get drunk. Eventually around midnight I started drinking vodka as well as my usual pints. I probably was drunk - I just didn't feel it. Damn - I can even remember walking home with one of my cousins.
I found out another of my cousins is gay. He's been married a few times and has three kids. I don't know any gay people. Well, I thought I didn't. I probably do know a few just don't know they're gay. I did find out about another person that's gay. Anyway, for me, finding out about my gay cousin was the highlight of the wedding reception. I found it hilarious. I don't mean to offend any gays by that comment. But when you don't know any gay people and then find out your own cousin is gay then you tend to find it funny. I had been thinking about my cousin recently because of Big Brother. He sounds just the same as Craig on that show. At the time I was thinking - just because he sounds effeminate doesn't necessarily mean he's gay (although Craig is). I was thinking my cousin sounds effeminate and he isn't gay......and now I find out he is after all.

Muddy path

Cycling home via the cycle path is enjoyable most nights - but not when it's been raining heavily. To get to the path I have to find my way through this. This is the view from the second fence I have to lift my bike over. There's still one more fence to go.

Sister's wedding

Getting more anxious as the day gets closer. I had said to myself a while back - I have no intention of carrying on with life if I'm still suffering from SA when I'm 40. But when my sister said she was getting married in August I could hardly top myself in May. But when her wedding's out of the way - there is nothing really to stop me from deciding at any point that I don't want any more part of this world. I've got my own life back to choose if I want to go on our not.
God - that was a depressing post. Guess the lack of sleep is making me depressed.

an ignorant git

Cycling home tonight I met a right ignorant git of an old woman. There is a path I cycle along which is not an actual cycle path. In fact there is a no cycling sign about a mile away at the start of this path.....but no such sign at the end of the path - the direction from where I was coming from. As a result of this any time I see people in front of me on the path I will move onto the grass at the side of the path out of their way. There is a bridge over a small stream so there is no grass for me to cycle on. Coming towards me were what looked like a woman with her mother pushing what I presume was her grandchild in a pushchair. They had a dog with them so I slowed down and in fact stopped and went by them pushing the bike along with my feet. The mother of the child said "sorry" to me as I went by as her dog had caused me to stop cycling. I could have continued but I put the safety of her dog first and wewnt slow. What annoyed me next was the gran pushing the chair in front of her snapped at me "well I'm not sorry - it's not a cycle path". Did she really have to say that? OK - at the moment it's not acycle path but North Ayrshire Council are keen to join this path up with another cycle path and so join up the whole region in a cycle path - this is the last part that doesn't have an official cycle path.
Getting back to this ignorant git - if I had accepted this was not an official cycle path - what was I to do. Get off my bike and walk this short distance. This would have meant me walking alongside my bike and so preventing her from walking across the bridge at the same time compared to me cycling and not taking up so much space.
When you read in the papers of old ladies being murdered for no apparent reason - well I wonder if they had just made some sarcastic remark to their murderer. If I didn't suffer from SA I would have given her abuse. Probably an old fart that's voted Tory all her life.

Semi Finals of a cup

The mighty Thitle have reached the semi final of a local cup competition. Up until about 14 years ago they had never even qualified for the knock-out (quarter final) stages. They've now qualified six times and reached the semi's once before. The team they will be playing in the semi final drew 5-5 last night before winning on penalties. 5-5.......you don't often see that sort of score these days. It does mean they are not too hot at the back so could this be the year we finally make the final of this competition. Well, tune in next week to find out.

Me in a kilt

I keep trying to post a picture but it's not coming up. Just as well as I'm an unshaven wreck in the picture.

Finally got the picture. My shoe laces are undone. I was only trying on the things to see if everything fitted as I would need to get things altered before Friday for the wedding on Saturday.

You could say I'm wearing th kilt like an Englishman but on Saturday I'll be like a true Scotsman.......and likely to be arrested because of it.

Are you calling me a butler?

Still unbeaten

This is the programme cover for this season. In the background you can see previous strips with the various sponsors. I think in the top right hand corner is a flag we got for winning the league in 2002 and the cup is for winning the league last season. Today was the opening day of the league season when the league flag was meant to be presented......but it was up to the clubs themselves to pay for a flag. As there was no presentation I assume they never bothered to pay for one.

It was a 1-1 draw today. God knows how we scraped a draw. What was funny was the ground was invaded by 40-50 extremely drunk people. I know 10 - 15 years ago I used to get drunk at the game and there used to be a group of us. Sometimes there would be a dozen of us and sometimes there were about 30. But we were never ALL drunk at the same time. Maybe one week one person would be drunk and he'd give it a miss the next week. Funnily enough - I never gave it a miss. But to have 40-50 of them arrive and ALL of them drunk was strange. They had been watching the Rangers v Celtic game on TV. Most of them were Rangers supporters but there were a few people with Irish tricolours draped over their backs. The police arrived with about 10 minutes to go and half of them scarpered. Thos that were left had their Buckfast poured out. There is a local bylaw which prevents drinking alcohol in a public place.

Mmmmmm

i ask this because im seriously considering a career in teahcing

I saw this on a forum just now and had to laugh. I hope the person who wrote it doesn't follow the link in my signature to this blog.
Lucky I caught my own typo before posting this.

More footie crap

Well we finished runners up in our section (unbeaten though). Which means we will have an away tie in ther quarter final. From a financial point of view this will be better as it will be against a club with a lot of supporters and the gate is shared - whereas had we had a home game it wouldn't have had the same crowd as the other team doesn't have many supporters.

Our oldest rivals finished bottom of the section with one draw and four defeats. In all my time of watching I don't recall this ever happening before (and I've been watching since 1977). So part of me is happy at that - but it still is one almighty fall from grace so to speak. Pissing down with rain all night - the game ended in darkness as we're not allowed to use floodlights. They are not powerful enough for a match to be played under - but are ok for training.

Cows are such shitebags

I just cycled near these cows and they started shiting themselves and ran away. Then when they realised there was a fence between them and me they got all brave and came back and started staring at me. What is this clown doing pointing that small metal box at me for? Even funnier if I had put it on flash. Then we'd have seen them panic.

Bidding on a book

I tried to get a book on Ebay some time back but lost out. The book came out in 1986 and I first heard about in in probably about 1992 or 1993 and have been after it ever since. I've got an earlier edition of the same book but I want this one. I'm not giving the name of the book as
a) I don't want anyone guessing my Ebay user id
b) I don't want anyone else bidding against me

It closes in about 9 hours time. I don't normalyl make any bids until the final minute of an auction but just in case I forget about this later on I'll make my bid now. I do know I can set up bid alerts - but they're not much use if I've fallen asleep.

So near and yet so far

What a boring cliché.
I thought we'd ended a quarter of a century hoodoo today by beating Kilwinning but our goal was chopped off in the final minute. A couple of shots off the bar. Completely outplayed them apart from a couple of short spells at the beginning of each half. Even our opponents knew they got out of jail today. A result would normally be accepted against our more illustrious opponents but there were a lot of disappointed face leaving the ground.
Barring a heavy defeat in out final game we should still qualify for the quarter finals. Although, it should be mentioned out worst defeat in recent years came against the team we now face. That season ended up being the biggest in the club's 100+ year history........but I don't want another 0-10 defeat.

Could do with another season like this one

Just looking at the goals scored this season (1957-58) and thinking we could do with that again. Especially a repeat of the result on December 14th. We play them tomorrow. We haven't won at their park since the 1979-80 season. A quarter of a fecking century. That run has got to come to an end soon. Problem is our two best defenders aren't available for tomorrow's game.

Dirty windows

Click on pic
This is a window in the workshop attached to the tiny office I work a couple of days a week. Scot is my oldest brother. 30th October 1976 he wrote his name on this dirty internal window and to this day it hasn't been cleaned off. My family took over this buiding in February 1970 so the dirt had no doubt been building up since then. There are four windows in this window frame. One of them is now smashed so there was no space for me to add my name. I did shove a sticker on the wooden frame on the 29th March 1983 and it is still there.

Jelly wobbler

Click for bigger picture

Saw this lying on the beach as I cycled home. Brought back some bad memories of being stung by one when young. And by the ned of the day my whole body was stinging as I must have been spreading the sting about. I think someone must have had the same idea as me as a child - pelting them with stones.

Dirty water

I never knew just how much water I must swallow while taking a shower. The other day I took a shower and the water was slightly discoloured. I do have a shower every day - I'm just getting round to posting now. So I thought, well, it's not that dirty - I can get away with showering in it - but I won't swallow any of the water. I then realised just how much water goes in my mouth.

My computer

This is my computers specifications. To think that a few years ago I was told that I would never need any more than 4GB. Jesus - I can download that in a few days. Click to see full size.

Man having a fit on a train

What happened on the train was we arrived in Stevenston (a few stops after I got on). One bloke wearing a baseball cap and cycling a bike got on. I was watching him closely because I am considering taking my bike on the train so I was keen to see where he put it. He never fully made it onto the train. I heard a muffled sound and then a noise from his mouth - a weird noise.
Now I don't have too high an opinion of the younger generation. Illustrated by about five minutes earlier two girls and a boy (about 12 years old or 13 at the very most) getting on the train. All three were smoking cigarettes. I thought they looked stupid at that age smoking. Then realised they shouldn't have been smoking in the train at all. But did I say anything to them. Of course not. Back to the guy having a fit. The first person to react was another 12/13 year old girl - but she didn't know what to do so she went and got a bloke in his early 20's to assist. He dragged the guy off the train which was due to pull out at any minute. I'm not particularly sure what you do with someone that is having a fit. I thought you were meant to just let them get on with it. This guy seem to be restraining him. Although to be fair he later just seemed to be holding the guy's head. All this time I was sat doing nothing. There was a man and woman slightly older than me and they also sat doing nothing. The next people to assist were the two chavettes and chavs that had earlier been smoking on the train. One of the chavettes got on her mobile phone to get an ambulance. Another young girl in her early 20's started going through they guy's jeans pockets. Presumably to find some identification or if there any simple instructions - what to do in case of etc etc. Then the guy appeared to fall asleep. The train driver and ticket inspector had now arrived. 20 or 30 minutes after this first started he suddenly woke up and wanted to get up. But they wouldn't let him till the ambulance arrived. The bloke that was sitting across from me then decided to get up and see what was happening. Because all the initial danger was over. My excuse, if you can call it that, was I suffer from bad Social Anxiety. I wonder what everyone else's excuse was. The only folk to help were chavs and chavettes and an early 20's bloke with long hair. God I hate folk with long hair. And he was good looking. I'd have "given him one" and I'm not even gay. Or maybe I am? Nah - I just want a pair of girls breasts for myself. He never did get the train. I dread to think what would have happened if he had taken a fit while cycling. Or maybe that's impossible - I don't know how fits work.

I was very conscious of people on the train on Sunday - especially if they were carrying rucksacks. I wasn't caring if they were "olive skinned" or not. If they were carrying anything I was suspicious.

downloading images from my camera

I've just tried putting the card into my computer and it was a piece of piss downloading all the pics quickly. Strangely, the pics look even better on the same monitor than they did with the previous computer. I think I'll need to install the cradle onto my new computer as I don't want to have to take the disc out each time.

I've got my new computer now

Just went up and got it this afternoon. I think I must have got it up and running by about 7:30pm. It's now 11:37pm and I've downloaded my first lesbian video. Couldn't wait any longer than 4 hours. It was meant to be a 400GB computer. But it's down to 361GB already. Still, that's a lot of lesbian videos I can fit in that space.

Aren't thumbs great?

Just been lying in bed thinking about how great thumbs are. Just think how often you use them. Tying your shoelaces.....holding a spoon or a fork or knife. Holding a screwdriver. It's much better than a willy - it doesn't have a mind of its own. God, how embarassing would that be? Sitting on a train and your thumb suddenly does erect. Looking like some stupid seventies kids tv presenter. Although if a thumb was used instead of a willy it could be handy. I could pee round corners and run away. Oh wait, I used to suck my thumb as a child. That's not right. Although it would be handy when I was older. Shit, when I was lying in my bed this was a serious thought to me - now look what's happened to it. I could write my name in the snow with greater accuracy than at present.

A thumb is only good when used in conjunction with your other fingers. What purpose would a willy serve if the thumb was to take over its functions. None - get rid of it. Bloody stupid looking thing anyway.

More pointlessness

This is a picture of one of the cupboard doors in my kitchen. I'll need to move on to door number three soon. Door number four doesn't exist anymore as it came off during one of my temper tantrums.

Talking to drunks

There's nothing worse than if you're sober having to make conversation with someone that's drunk.

I was walking out to the football today and halfway there I met my Uncle across the street. So I walked out the rest of the way with him. Had I walked out at my own pace I would have seen the kick off but because I had to wait on him......well, I didn't want to look an ignorant git, I missed the start. No problem there - I only saw the start of ONE home game all of last season but I've saw the start of both home games this season and was wanting to keep the run going. My uncle had been in the pub a little too long. God, now I know what people had to put up with when I was drunk. At least my uncle was speaking in English - unlike the drivel I talk that no-one can understand.

We won 5-1 and we now top our section.

Another five goals

Another win at home - this time 5-1. More players sent off.
Should be another win next Wednesday away from home - then it's the last two games which are the toughies. I reckon we could qualifty for the quarter finals. Something we are not known for over the years.
A lovely sunny day. So why do I feel miserable?

You say tomatoes, I say tomatoes

I've placed some coins here just to let you see the sixe of these tomatoes. My father brought me down some macaroni and cheese to the office where I was working and had these tomatoes. He grows them himself. Huge aren't they?
That was all the coins I had in my pocket.

It's just another manic Monday

As usual - click on the pic for bigger version
I'm getting depressed thinking about the happy times I spent in this hotel. You'll have to read the rest of the blog - there was a hotel here and it's now been knocked down.
This place opened half an hour earlier than other pubs on a Sunday. I had a system whereby if I heard "Manic Monday" by the Bangles I would get legless because it contained the words "it's just another manic Monday, I wish it was Sunday, that's my fun day". It was on the jukebox in the pub so there was a fair chance it would be played (especially by me if truth be told). I wish I could go back in time to those days. There are a few things I'd like to change. A few mistakes I'd like to correct. A few things I should have done but didn't.

Stop the world - I want to get off. Any chicken left me-luv-pandas. I have no real desire to waken up in the mornings any more.

Cipramil

I think I'll need to go back to the docs and get myself back onto Cipramil. I hadn't really been depressed much lately but it's just hit me like a ton of bricks. I only get depressed when I think about my life so I avoid thinking about my life.....in fact I just avoid thinking altogether. But lately I've just been thinking - what the fuck is the point? I mean, I've been living in this flat for 16 years now and have achieved nothing in all that time. Nothing has changed. Everyone I grew up with has moved on with their lives. Got married, had kids, got divorced, killed their neighbours. But what have I done. Sweet Fuck All.

And the beat goes on.

New season starts

What a great way to start the season - by humping your oldest rivals 5-0. A player sent off, again, in fact - it was the same player sent off in Saturday's friendly, as well as a penalty missed. Life is good. Apart from my computer finally died last night.

Update : bloody typical. There's six teams in our section which means three games each afternoon or night the games are played. So what were the other two results.......5-0 and 6-0 (the team that won 5-0 is below us in the alphabet so they go above us in the league table).

You may wonder why I don't mention any of the club names - well, I don't want someone Googling their club's name and finding this blog. One of the teams we play, the last game in our section, we haven't won on their ground since the 1979-80 season. Over a quarter of century. I think it's time we ended this run of failure.

The new football season

The season officially begins tomorrow night with our first game in the sectional league cup. This is organised in geographically local groups (4 groups of 6 clubs). Which means our first game is againt our oldest rivals. They are actually in the league below us.......this is the first time in our history we have started the season in a higher division than them. We beat them twice in this cup last season (3-0 at home and 6-3 away.......this was the first time we had scored more than 5 goals against them in one game since the 1950's). So we will start this game as favourites to win. I don't really care about this cup. I can't see us qualifying (the top two qualify) - but if we beat our rivals I'll be happy.

Last season had a strange situation. The way the quarter finals were drawn we went into our last game of the league section knowing that a win would mean our quarter final tie was away from home to the runners up of the section. So both clubs in that final game were determined not to win. Even got to the stage of one club missing a penalty. But we eventually won by a late goal. The player was sacked. Only joking. I think we got humped 6-1 against the same club in the quarter final.

Usually, at the start of the season the club is in dire straits. There is usually no committee, no money, hardly any players have re-signed. But this season almost all the players have now signed, we've got a better goalkeeper (he also lives in the town - plus another local player looks as though he will be signing up for another stint at the club). There is a few more on the committee. The ground looks a little bit better. There is now an anti-climb grease on top of the fencing round the ground to keep supporters from escaping. There is still a lack of money - but we can't have everything. We get a flag for winning the leage the previous season - unfortuinately, we have to pay for the flag ourselves.

Nowhere is safe from clutter

Click on the picture for larger size

Even my kitchen is full of junk. A bag of marbles. A radio (tuned to Westsound and only used between 2pm and 6pm on Saturday's - even if I'm not in the flat).

Weird dream

I had this really strange dream that I was in car with my gran and grandpa. Both of them are now dead. I've been in a car with my grandpa many times before, he was driving up until he was nearly 90 (and that was usually the speed as well), but I can't recall ever being in a car with my gran. On the radio was someone doing a cover version of Dido's Life for rent....but it was being sung in french. Also strange was the fan blowing air around the car was really blasting air out and I didn't know how to switch it off.

It's light outside

Great (he says sarcastically), it's light outside. I'm still struggling with this VAT return and it is now light outside. So it looks like I'm going to get no sleep before I start the new day. BOALAX.

CMOS/GPNV Checksum Bad

CMOS/GPNV Checksum Bad
Now, what the hell does that gibberish mean. Although, at least it's kind enough to say it's "bad". No fucking Sherlock - the fact it takes 100 attempts at switching the computer on tells me it's bad. I want to know WHAT is bad.

Fat Bastard

I know someone that's bid on a Fat Bastard on Ebay. I was soooooooooooooooooooo tempted to sneak in and outbid them just for a laugh. Actually, given what it's wearing I reckon it looks quite like me. Maybe I should outbid them after all. I think it closes in about 8 hours time. I should be doing a VAT return just now (it was due in yesterday so given the post it will be a few days late) instead of looking at Ebay. God it's after 4am and I'm shattered.