This heat is killing me

Well yesterday I spent the day like a slob - unable to get off my settee - I just slept there most of the time. And now my back is in agony as a result. I also stabbed my left foot with a kitchen knife. It was lying on the floor. My left foot stood on the blade. My right foot stood on the handle and slid the blade into my left foot. I have little feeling in my right foot because of a back operation about 9 or 10 years ago so I couldn't stop it. Actually, it was a mountain out of a molehill. There was bugger all wrong with my left foot. A big fucking Jessie is all I am. I've just been reading about someone else that has had to go to hospital last night because of them cutting themself that bad and I'm worrying about a pin prick.