Answer the phone

This is what I got for not answering the phone. I was at a Sportsmans' Dinner for my local football club. During the first speaker my phone goes off. I manage to get it out and cut the caller off. Then it goes off again. So I cut it off again. I turn the volume right down and put the phone in my pocket. And then it starts vibrating. So I let it vibrate for a couple of minutes and turn it off. I then text the caller to say it was a bad time to call and then this is what I get. I ask you - what has happened to the standard of english teaching in our school tuday. Of all the times for it to start ringing. I try and be anonumous most of the time because I suffer from Social Anxiety and then this happens.

why does my eye always close

I was talking to my Dad on Thursday and noticed one of his eyes was more shut than the other. I've notied the same thing with me. One eye always seems more shut than the other.

The wrong person

Why is it when I'm depressed I always think back to my youth and then feel even more depressed. I can honestly say that the last time I was really happy was the summer of 1982. I can't say I remember anything of that summer. I just left school and was drunk most of the summer. By November things had started to go sour. I've a permanent reminder of the 5th November of that year. I became the ultimate wrong person that night. I don't what's worse....being a wrong person? Or now that I'm old - a non-person? I think my batch of home brewed lager had ripened (I don't know the right word) around that time. I was drunk every night in October. I say "home brewed lager" - it had the same colour as lager but that's where the similarities ended. I remember drinking it with someone one night and we went through packet upon packet of chewing gum in an attempt to deaden the taste. I was crazy stuff. It didn't do anything to your legs. But it made your lips go numb. And talking was impossible. So you'd walk up to someone and they wouldn't notice anything out the ordinary. You'd open your mouth and it was like Bill and Ben, the flowerpot men.

My cheap bouncy shoes

These cost £10 - and you can see why. The bit at the front isn't stitched - it is glued. 3 months maximum I'll give them and that's if I just wear them once a week for half an hour.

Is it bad luck to put new shoes on a table? Well I've worn them once so they're no longer new. Besides I've broke six mirrors already to justify my life of bad luck.

Must be the angle I took the picture at and the way the shoes are placed but they look really small. They are actually size 13. And you know what the say about blokes with big feet.........they have a fucking nightmare of a time finding shoes to fit them.

Missed work today

I missed work today. I just dithered about too long this morning on the computer and by the time I'd finished it had started to rain a little. So I thought, I'll give it 15 minutes for the rain to go off. But it didn't. It got harder. My brother's van passed by my bedroom window so I picked up the phone to see if he could give me a lift to work if he was heading back that way. But I wasn't fully dressed. With hindsight, I should just have gone ahead and phoned him as it would only have taken me 5 or 10 minutes to get ready. By this time the rain was belting down and there was a vicious wind. If t had just been windy - I'd have cycled. If it had been raining on its own - I'd have put on waterproof trousers and cycled. But wet and windy - is just too misearble to cycle in. I wish I'd just gone when I had first thought of switching off the computer....around 10:30 am.

Bouncy shoes

Just went out in my cheapo trainers to Morrisons. Christ - they are bouncy. I almost felt like running in them......then remembered my right foot is mostly numb and I'd end up falling over. They even look cheap. Still - I'm an old fart now. I buy things based on cost not on looks. Wait a minute - I've always done this. I must have been born an old fart.

Songs reminded me of places

Do you ever get this where a song can remind you of a particular place or whatever you were doing. Just after posting these pictures of the space where a hotel once stood it brought it back to me that every time I hear "Road to nowhere" by the Talking Heads reminds me of sitting at the bar of that hotel on a Sunday eating a pie. It probably means nothing to the one person reading this blog....or maybe a second person that clicked on to it by mistake etc. The Sunday part is very particular. It had an earlier licence than most on a Sunday. Mid-day, instead of 12:30pm that all the others opened at. An extra half hour meant everything on a Sunday if you had a hangover and wanted a curer. Certain songs by Simple Minds also remind me of this hotel/pub. Another reason this has just occurred to me is I'm listening to Virgin radio Classic Rock (0184) on satelite tv and "Brothers in arms" by Dire Straits. This also reminds me of eating a pie - but in no particular place. Must be getting nostalgic in my old age. Or maybe just wanting my youth to return.



Brothes in Arms

Transparent adverts

I'm pretty sure I clicked on a transparaent advert on the Channel Four news forum. One of these things that didn't get blocked by my pop-up killer. But when I went to click a link I was taken to the full advert website rather than another page on the C4 news forum. They're sneaky buggers right enough.

Now we've got to wonder what they are building behind this board. Maybe they're putting in an underground bunker and then building on top of it. Nobody wants hotels in this area. They just knock them down and build flats.

Better still - they knocked down a house that was only built under 10 years ago in order to make way for six flats.

More hotel pics

Finally boarded up....apart from the bit round the metal boat. Which hopefully I will have in another picture - if www.blogger.arse allows me.

Getting really old

I already got one shopping trolley free - now I'm considering getting another one free. I got another two pairs of slippers. But last night on Ebay I bought a shoe horn. Surely only old people have these. I did get a free one when I bought some shoes before but I've lost it. I'll bet it turns up the day after the Ebay one does.

Why can't I choose where I want the image to go. I wanted it to go below this bumph. These are the slippers - but not this colour.

Shoes and slippers

Because I take a size 13 in shoes it is quite difficult for me to get shoes. I order mine online from Clifford Jones. I ordered them on the 19th and that's them arrived today. So what I hear you say as some stores you can order at 7pm at night and they will deliver the next day. Well the last time I ordered over the internet from C J the order didn't even arrive. When I did order it the old fashioned way it took weeks to arrive. I've now got another two pairs of slippers. And two pairs of trainers. I expect the trainers to last 3 months at most. I got two pairs for £20. You get what you pay for. I am still awaiting another pair of shoes - but these won't be here until the end of April. I got a free key holder. Man, that was a struggle to get my keys into that thing.

Superstition

I mentioned to someone today about a stupid superstition I have when I am shaving.
I rarely have any hot water in my flat. In fact, any time I need hot water - be it for washing the plastic dishes that can't go in the dishwasher (once a year) or water for shaving I will just fill up the bathroom sink etc with the shower hose. It can stretch over because my bathroom is so small. The water for the dishes I put into a plastic tub. Back to my superstition.....

After I have shaved and removed the plug and let the water go from the sink I MUST spray the basin with the shower hose while the water is draining away. I can't let all the water drain away and then spray the basin (to fill it back up again to splash my face with water). Nor can I bring the shower hose over before I remove the plug.

Burnt my fingers.
In the tiny kitchen (just a sink really) of the office/workshop where I work a couple of days a week the light switch doesn't work. It's a pull switch thingy on a cord. So I have to get out a set of steps each time and put the lightbulb in and then remove it at the end of the day. Fortunately the light switch is stuck in the "on" position. Tonight I did my usual, remove the bulb with a towel in my hand to prevent me from getting burnt....but then I went to put it into a plastic container and stupidly I transfered the bulb from the hand with the towel to my thumb and forefinger of the other hand - and it was being held by the metal bit of the bulb. It;s still sore on those fingers now several hours later.

Hotel pic 2

Blooger.com getting on my tits

This blogger.com is getting right on my tits now. I'm trying to upload two more pics of the hotel but it isn't letting me. Fine - but can you at least tell me why not. Are the pictures too large (larger ones have made it through). Have I used up too much space with all my photos - if so, for fucks sake tell me.

Hotel pic 1

First pic.

I'm sure I published some photos before from when the hotel that used to stand on this spot was knocked down. It is across the road from the office/workshop where I work a couple of days a week. Well, I think they must be getting round to re-building on the spot as it has been surrounded by boards. Not completely, as can be seen by the final picture. All of these pictures can be enlarged hopefully by clicking on them.There is a large metal boat that hasn't moved for months on end and it is preventing them from completely boarding the area up. Wonder how they'll resolve that. Who knows? Who cares? This village where I once lived once boasted three pubs/hotels - now there's only one. The town where I now live is about to lose yet another hotel and flats will be built on this spot. This is another LARGE hotel. Five or six really large hotels in that same area of town have gone the same way over the last decade or so.

Kettle AGAIN!!

In the words of Victor Meldrew "I don't belieeeeeeeeeeeve it".

I've only gone and done it again. This time my washing machine was rumbling away in the kitchen at the same time as I put the kettle on. As I sat on my settee the noise started to annoy me so I closed the sliding door to the kitchen. After the washing machine had finished I went back into the kitchen and thought "a bit warm in here". Also the funny smell was back. Does my memory only last 30 seconds now.

Well I've no excuse for not getting to work for 9am tomorrow. I've made my sandwiches and they're in the fridge. My clothes are all ready just to put on. I've got most of what i need to do in the flat done just now so I can go to my bed at midnight or earlier.

Near porridge disaster

I'm rapidly running out of cornflakes and as I can't be arsed going to the supermarket to get "just" cornflakes I thought I'd give myself a few extra days by having porridge instead. I knew the bowl I intended eating the porridge out of - a glass bowl. But my brain kind of shut off this morning. I placed the porridge and milk in this bowl instead of a pot for heating up on the cooker. I couldn't figure out why the porridge was taking so long to come to the boil. Then it dawned on me. The glass bowl tapers down to a small base unlike a pot which has a larger surface area to get the heat from the cooker. But that aside - luckily I realised in time otherwise who knows what would have happened. I know it's safe to use the glass bowl in a microwave - just not so sure about on top of a cooker.

What a way to go.....my body punctured by shards of glass and smothered in porridge.

Back to my porridge - the instructions say "add salt to taste" - aye, that'll be shining bright (to use some Scottish rhyming slang). I think I'll just add sugar. I come from a family that even adds sugar to Kelloggs Frosties.

I'll need to get a new kettle

I've just managed to completely boil away 3 pints of water because the switch doesn't work on my kettle. I put the kettle on then went into my bedroom. Some time later I came into the living room of my (tiny) flat. I thought - this seems warmer than normal. There was a funny smell. That's odd - I didn't think the pie smelled like that. (The pie I covered the computer monitor in - see below). Then I got to the kitchen and it was completely streamed out. Kettle still works - it's re-boiling just now....this time I'm going to wait here till it boils.

That's the monitor decorated then.

I just had a mouthful of pie (no - get yer mind out the gutter) mixed in with salad cream and it was a bit too hot. So I coughed it back up. Now my computer has been completely sprayed with the contents of my mouth.

Finally washed the plastic stuff

You're not meant to put plastic stuff in a dishwasher. So, all my plastic containers have been piling up on my kitchen sink. They all fit inside each other. You kow, ice cream containers, Vitalite tubs etc. They have been building up for months waiting to be washed. I mean literally months. It wouldn't surprise me if they've been there for a year. This time I'm going to take a note that I've washed them today.....just to see how long I do let them pile up for. Although it is now my intention to wash them more often before they get the chance to accumulate. This is all in my grand plan to have a more organised life. I am getting partly there. My book-keeping for the restaurant I work for is done mostly on the Monday now - with maybe it spiliing over for an hour on the Tuesday. Before it was half hours here, there and everywhere.

9pm
It's now 9pm and I have a pile of washing in a basket on the living room floor. I hang them up to dry in my hallway. If I hung them up outside in the garden I'd forget all about them. The only problem is I've run out of of clothes hangers to hang them up top dry on.

What the hell is this gaelic mince I'm listening to on the tv. It's like the old Billy Connolly joke.

"That's them at the shaggin' next door"
"How the hell do you know they're shagging?"
"Because I can hear a gaelic program on their tv"
"So?"
"Naebody listens to gaelic on the tv"

Is it worth it?

Makes me wonder if it's worth my while placing an advert in the local newspaper if this is all I'm greeted with each day. Pah!!

My Council Tax bill

Just thought I'd scan and post this. As usual - click on the pic to see it in larger size.

Coo Dunnit

I don't remember getting sent this picture but I found it in amongst some e-mailed pictures. 

The cyclist

This is what the fat bald git looks like as he sets off on his long cycle home. It has been pointed out that my cycle helmet is too small for my head. This is wrong. The helmet is the correct size - just my head is too big. I'm getting bored. I think I'll search my computer and just post random stupid pictures.

 

Cycle clip

10:00pm - that's when I realised I still had a cycle clip on my trousers.

Found someone I may know's blog

I searched for the football team I support on the blogs and found a blog from someone I may know in real life. Well, when I say know - I mean I've seen this person at the football a few times. This person made his blog (or Live Journal) private for his friends only - because he was worried he was giving out too much personal information and he may be stalked by some weirdo. He's only 16 - although at that age he could get married if he wanted to. His name is on his blog so the next time I'm at the football I'm going to ask someone his name just to see if I have the right person. AND NO - i am not the weirdo stalker. It's just to satisfy my curiosity. That's why I don't like to put my name or town on this blog.....although I have posted my own picture a few times. If I was a bastard (I am, I am) I could say to him I was reading his blog. Then he'd really shit himself as he goes to the football with his father every week. He looks quite a nerdy type at the football - but he tries to act the hard man on his blog. Twat. having said all that - I'm dreading someone coming up to me and saying they've read my blog.

Profound text

Quite a text. I like the last line. That's why I kept the text and photographed it.

Funny texts

Sometimes the text messages I get can be quite funny.

Fucking passwords

I was flicking through all the blogs - by clicking the link in the top right of my own blog and came across this blog that required a password to enter it. I pressed cancel as I wanted to move on to the next blog. Dialogue box pops back up again. I enter a random password. Nothing. Password box pops back up again. I can't go to any other tab in Firefox. In fact, all I can do is Ctrl-Alt-Del and shut Firefox down that way. What a fucking annoying blog. What is the point of it. Why put it into a public place if you don't want outsiders to visit it. Prat. 2pm and done bugger all today. That's it. I'm going to post this and re-boot this computer. It's been on for about 4 days now. I can understand leaving the one in my bedroom for 4 days or more. Even about 30 days. But this one usually gets re-started every day.

Not allowed to play in the snow

I remember in my youth at school that when it snowed we were allowed out into the playing fields to throw snowballs at each other. Rather than the school playground. The Deputy Headmaster (Slinky, as we knew him) would stand in the middle to make sure it didn't get too violent. He was just a target then. Whenever he faced one way, those behind him would bombard him with snowballs. When he turned round in the hope of catching someone then the other lot would bombard him. Now, I don't think they are even allowed out into the playground. I can slightly accept this today as it is mostly slushy there now - but they playing fields aren't. Health and Safety gone mad. Or is it Political Correctness? The same stupid rules that prevent people from playing conkers. I'd hate to be a child growing up today. Apart from the fact they remove your brain at 12 years old - judging from some of the neanderthals that wander the streets. Annnnnnnnnnnnnnd - they don't even get the same amount of snow. When we were young it would be up to your knees. It would snow for weeks on end. The snow would constantly be replenished. Instead, it snows for a day. Then thaws out the next day. What use is that?

Photo Blog

Photo Blog
You'll have to right click on this and open it in a new browser window or a new tab otherwise you'll be taken away from my blog. I was clicking on the "Next Blog" at the top right of my blog and found this blog. It cames as a bit of a shock the find Tiffany and Debbie Gibson had done some nude photo shoots. They were 80's versions of Britney Spears. Except they were whiter than white.

Click on the picture for a larger version.
This is the ground where I spend most of my Saturdays. I suppose I've spent a fair portion of my life at the same spot (standing at the back of the stand on a bench). I first went there in 1977. 28 years later. Maybe 20 games a season at home. 1½ hours each week. Call it two hours as I'm there before the game and 15 minutes at half time.
The reason I took the picture today was to wind up the team we played yesterday. We did the double over them for the first time since 1979-80 season. That is, we won both the home league game and the away league game. They totally outplayed us yesterday. But we still won 2-0. Daylight robbery. Such fun. Anyways - I thought I'd post this picture on their forum and ask them if they would have been happy to see this sight yesterday knowing they got beat.

Click on the picture for a larger size.
The view out my living room window this morning. When the snow on the telephone wires thawed out it fell to the ground below and left lines in the snow. To start with I couldn't figure out why the lines were there. Not a very exciting picture I know but better than what it's like without the snow.

Snow's thawing

I went for a walk around my town today. I've lived here since the end of June 1989 but in all that time I've never actually gone for a walk without going somewhere. What I mean is, maybe I've walked about a mile in the town but I was always heading somewhere. Like the supermarket. Or the football. Because of the snow today I thought I'd go out and take a picture of the football ground covered in snow. Then I took a walk down to the prom and along the prom - but not on the pavement. I walked along the grass (covered in snow) next to the prom. It was great leaving a set of footprints in the snow where previously it was just a large white blanket.
It was weird at times. Because I was walking different from normal. I was lifting my legs higher than normal. My legs felt numb by the time I got home. Really strange. At least my tv is back on.
I'm in two minds about what I want to happen with the snow. Do I want it to completely disappear for tomorrow as I have to go to the restaurant for my book-keeping. Or do I want it to remain for a few more days.....but clearing up in time for the football next week. I met my cousin and he's clear about he wants. He's a greenkeeper at a golf club. He wants it to snow for the next week so he doesn't have to go to work.
Ach well, that's enough for my blog for now.

Snowing......

That caught me by surprise.
The satelite signal on my TV went out earlier on tonight. I've been going mad trying to find out what was up. Unplugging the thing and plugging it back in. I finally decided to call it a night (at 2:10am) and went for a pee before bed. All the curtains in my house are drawn so I got abit of a shock when outside is completely white.
So THAT'S what's buggered up my signal all night. Fuck. I hope it's OK in the morning and I don't have to get the TV guy out to sort it. I was even searching through my blog to see EXACTLY when I bought the Freesat. I was convinced it must be one year and one day - so it was outside my guarantee. I am convinced they have programmed the things to go wrong then.

Ah well. I like snow - but not when it fucks up my tv. Besides, it usually thaws within a few hours. We never get real snow here anymore. I blame Maggie Thatcher. Since she came to power we haven't had any real snow (apart from the winter of 81-82).

It's me again

I'm back.

What am I going to post about? Mobile phones.

I mostly only use it for texting. Very few people actually phone me. In fact, only one person actually phones me. She reads this blog now and then. YOU!!! Yes - you. I'm talking about you again. Somehow I'd managed to set my phone to vibrate when I left for the football. While I was at the football I had the phone in my hand and my hand in my pocket - I use the clock on it as I can't be arsed wearing a watch. Anyways, the phone started vibrating - which gave me a surprise and then I didn't recognise the phone number. I was meant to text someone the goals from the match I was at as he was away at a wedding. His phone didn't work where he was so he borrowed his girlfriend's phone to ask me the score just before half time. It was 0-0. His girlfriend supports the team we were playing against so must have been pissed off as I texted HER phone first to say it was 1-0 and then 2-0......totally against the run of play. Great. 26 years since we've done the "double" over them.

Lollypop sticks

I think it is a bit worrying that a 40 year old has a container of lollypop sticks. 154 of them plus another 19 still stuck to the lollypops in my freezer. What the hell am I keeping them for - I don't know.

 

milk cartons and cup a soups

Leaking milk cartons
I’m mightily pissed off again. Milk cartons this time. I bought four pints on Wednesday night. I’d only drank half of that and tonight I bought two 6 pint cartons. The space in my fridge for keeping them upright can only contain two cartons. So one has to go on it’s side. I thought I’d try the four pint container. I go back half an hour later and see milk on the fridge floor. Well, now it’s one of the six pint containers that’s on it’s side. I’ll see if it’s any better.

Chicken cup a soups
They’re now making Bachelor’s Cup a Soup in jars. So I can put as much powder in a cup as I want – making it thicker than when using the sachets.

Musty smell and Blutak

So I washed my bedsheets but forgot to put them out to dry. I don't put them outside to dry I put them over a libe in my hallway. But they had lay in the washing machine for three days and had a musty smell about them. I can't even bung them straight back in the wash as they need to be dried before re-washed as the musty smell remains otherwise. They have been dried now and re-washed.....and guess what - I left them in the washing machine for a couple of days again. They don't have a musty smell this time.....yet. Otherwise it will be third time lucky.

BLU TAK
I love Blu Tax....especially when you've just taken a new batch out it's container. It's all flat and you can just yank both ends and stretch it like a rubber band.

Martina Hingis

Just thought I'd post the original of this pic before I merged it with a multi coloured sheep. I don't recall ever finding Miss Hingis all that attractive but dagnabbit she's attractive in this picture......and that's nothing to do with her nips showing through. 

Martini Hingis mixed in with a mulitcoloured sheep. 

Squirrels

There was a squirrel appeared in the back garden a short while. Man, can those little creatures move fast. I picked up my camera to take a picture of it and it was gone.....a few gardens down I saw it running along the wall. In my 40 years only twice have I seen a squirrel in this town and the first time was only a few weeks ago.

Happiness is..........

..........finding a micowavable cheeseburger in the freezer you didn't know you had.

Mmmm

This isn't a post to my blog - it is just easier to copy it here han to create a file on my own computer for it.

1). When I burn a bull on the altar as a sacrifice, I know it creates a pleasing odour for the Lord (Lev. 1:9). The problem is my neighbours. They claim the odour is not pleasing to them. Should I smite them?

2). I would like to sell my daughter into slavery, as sanctioned in Exodus 21:7. In this day and age, what do you think would be a fair price for her?

3). I know that I am allowed no contact with a woman while she is in her period of menstrual cleanliness (Lev. 15:19-24). The problem is, how do I tell? I have tried asking, but most women take offence.

4). Leviticus 25:44 states that I may indeed possess slaves, both male and female, provided they are purchased from neighbouring nations. A friend of mine claims that this applies to Mexicans, but not to Canadians. Can you clarify? Why can't I own Canadians?

5). I have a neighbour who insists on working on the Sabbath. Exodus 35:2 clearly states that he should be put to death. Am I morally obligated to kill him myself?

6). A friend of mine feels that even though eating shellfish is a abomination of Leviticus 11:10, it is a lesser abomination than homosexuality. I don't agree. Can you settle this?

7). Leviticus 21:20 states that I may not approach the altar of God if I have a defect in my sight. I have to admit that I wear reading glasses. Does my vision have to be 20/20, or is there some wiggle room here?

8) Most of my male friends get their hair trimmed, including the hair around their temples, even though this is expressly forbidden by Leviticus 19:27. How should they die?

9). I know from Leviticus 11:6-8 that touching the skin of a dead pig makes me unclean, but may I still play football if I wear gloves?

10). My uncle has a farm. He violates Leviticus 19:19 by planting two different crops in the same field, as does his wife by wearing garments made of two different kinds of thread (cotton/polyester blend). He also tends to curse and blaspheme a lot. Is it really necessary that we go to all the trouble of getting the whole town together to stone them? (Lev. 24:10-16). Couldn't we just burn them to death at a private family affair like we do with people who sleep with their in-laws? (Lev. 20:14).

A funny sight

My brother chasing his van
A rather amusing sight today…..My brother came into the office where I work a couple of days a week. He was talking to me about this and that. From where he was talking to me he could see out the window to the street outside. All of a sudden he started running out the office. No explanation. He came back in and said the van was moving backwards…….and he was the van driver but he was inside talking to me. Luckily the van didn’t stray too far and didn’t make it on to the main road.

Cable clutter

Click on pic for a bigger version
This is the cable clutter at the side of my bed. This is where my head rests - just inches from this disaster just waiting to happen.
Jeeeeeeez - this place needs hoovered - BADLY.

Mightily pissed off now

Why is my "Google toolbar for Firefox" not installing. I just get their privacy policy page. No buttons o click to say I agree to their terms and conditions. I fucking hate it when two programs conflict with each other but they won't admit there is a conflict. It's doing my head in.

Ebay and gas men

The Gas Man cometh

Just had the gas man round. I found it funny he didn’t know whether he was here to read the gas or electricity. 2090 is the reading just in case I forget to take a note of it. Bloody obstacle course he must have been thinking as he had to carefully tread round all the things I have scattered on the floor.

Three Ebay auctions won in the one day
Just won three Ebay auctions – all from the same person. The git prefers to be paid by cheque.  What was even funnier was I beat the same person twice. He/She had previously put in bids. The second one he saw I had outbid him so upped his bid but I sneaked in with about 20 seconds to go. He must have been thinking I’m not getting done again.
(Probably a he as it was a non-league football books and the only time I see females at non-league games is when they are the partner of one of the players)

Bicycle clips

When am I going to take these freakin' bicycle clips off? I put them on this morning when I went to the restaurant to collect some invoices and pay their monthly bills (which I couldn't do because no-one knew where the box that keeps the invoices and cheque book were kept.....I'll need to go down tomorrow instead, which will suit me fine as I was up till 5:30am this morning).
I knew I had to go to the supermarket so I kept them on. I've now been to the supermarket and they're still on my legs. That's hours they've been on now. My feet will be blue with the circulation cut off.

Stupid dreams

I just spent ages trying to explain a dream I had but had to delete it because it was pointless. Who wants to know about my dreams anyway. Believe me, this dream was so boring you really don’t want to know about it. It basically involved a three year old girl doing a gymnastic move which was physically impossible in real life. It would have twisted the arms out of their sockets if she had succeeded in doing what she was trying. I was standing behind her and holding both her hands by her sides – and she was doing a move – the sort of thing you’d see a gymnast doing on parallel bars. But of the parallel bars she’d get to move her hands. In this dream I was holding them – hence why I said she would have twisted the arms out their sockets if it had been real life. So what does this dream mean all you dream analysts.

I’ve started singing into my computers microphone. My upstair neighbours have to put up arguing with myself – now they have to put up with my singing as well.

Where's my blogger add-in gone to now?

This is getting weird. The Blogging add-in for Word disappeared but now I’ve got it back.

I just wish that when I install a program that fucks with another program I would be told during the installation process. Why does Windows make things so complicated. I thought computers were meant to make things easy. Fucking geeks – I hate them all.

My wee toe
I smashed my wee toe off a pile of soup tins I’d left in a bag on my living room floor. Maybe if I kept things a bit tidier I wouldn’t have walked into them. I must have hit it with some force as it cut my toe open.

Unsmelly socks
I can’t believe my socks aren’t smelly. I’ve been wearing them all day. Maybe my nose is fucked. (A bit like Kate Moss’s I suppose………allegedly, in case any of her lawyers happen to read pointless blogs).

Imagine being called a 270

I thought it was bad being called a 269. But then to be called a 270. Imagine how hurt I was.

Missing the toilet

Probably a misleading title for the post - but I went to the toilet at around 11:30am on Monday morning. This is me now using the toilet for the first time since then at 1:05am Tuesday morning. That is not healthy. 13½ hours.

Cup competitions

My football team won a cup tie away from home on Saturday. No big deal. They were expected to win as it was against a club from a lower division. I knew our record in this competition was bad but I've just looked at their results in my lifetime (40 years). In that time we have only reached the third round of this competition on three occasions. OK, on one of those occasions we went on and won the cup. But three times in 40 years is dreadful. Especially as we've reached the 5th round and 6th round of the national competition quite a few times just in the last 15 years. Yet this cup, which has a third amount of teams as the national competition we have never done as well.

This cup began in 1927 (I won't bore you with the details of WHY it began) and it took my club (deliberately leaving the club name out) until 1947 before they won a game.

No game on saturday. What am I going to do? I could always look for a pair of rubber gloves and get friendly with Angus Kilroy.

Wireless mouse

Great idea - but if you use your computer for more than half an hour a day not so good. The odd behavious of the mose over the last fortnight was due to the batteries inside the mouse dying. All of a sudden the cursor would jump to the top of the page. If I was dragging files around my computer they would be copied to an unknown location. Folders would be moved and I've still to find some of them. So if this started a fortnight ago it means the batteries only last about three weeks with constant use.
I hate computers. I hate my Freesat. In fact I hate anything electronic. It is fucking me up tonight. I'm back to believing in an evil God with fuck all better to do than mess around with me. Hey God - why don't you blow something up then I know it's really you messing with my - rather than have a collection of small things go wrong. Ya big gobshite that you are. 483 483 483 483 483 483 483 483 483 483 483 483 483 483 483 483 483 483 483 483 483 483 483 483 483 483 483 483 483 483 483 483 483 483 483 483 483 483 483 483 483 483 483 483 483 483 483 483 483 483 483 483 483 483 483 483 483 483 483 483 483 483 483 483 483 483 483 483 483 483 483 483 483 483 483 483 483 483 483 483 483 483 483 483 483 483 483 483 483 483 483 483 483 483 483 483 483 483 483 483 483 483 483 483 483 483 483 483 483 483 483 483 483 483 483 483 483 483 483 483 483 483 483 483 483 483 483 483 483 483 483 483 483 483 483 483 483 483 483 483 483 483 483 483 483 483 483 483 483 483 483 483 483 483 483 483 483 483 483 483 483 483 483 483 483 483 483 483 483 483 483 483 483 483 483 483 483 483 483 483 483 483 483 483 483 483 483 483 483 483 483 483 483 483 483 483 483 483 483 483 483 483 483 483

Advantages of word

Advantages of Word
The only real advantage of using Word 2003 to post to my blog is the spellchecker and I can see the post in a reasonable size. Other than that it’s shit.
Still haven’t got the proper monitor for this computer. It’s in the shop – just haven’t been able to persuade my brother to give me a lift to get the thing. I wish I’d learned to drive as a youth….but of course, my SA prevented me. This fucking SA has prevented me from doing everything.

This mouse of mine has got a mind of its own. It will suddenly just jump to the top of the page. First time I’ve used a mouse that doesn’t have a wire so maybe that’s what happens when the battery dies. What is it with me and dying batteries.

Late Again

Late Again
Try writing in red this time.
Here it is 12:16pm and I still haven’t set off for work yet. The rechargeable batteries on my bike light no longer work. They last one winter and then they pack in. Marvellous. This means I’ll need to be home before it’s dark. This is getting harder and harder. Of course I could do the sensible thing and go to my bed at midnight (or earlier) and then get up at 8am. It’d never work. Don’t normally work on a Tuesday but as I’m seeing the shrink on Thursday I need to come in a day early.

Blogging from Word 2003

Blogging from Word 2003
So I’ve installed the plug in – what next. Will I be able to publish directly from Word 2003. And if so what good will it do me.

To think tonight I was going to get to my bed at 1am so I could be up at 9am and off to work early. Well it’s now 3am and I’m posting rubbish on my blog. I can’t breathe. No wait, I can breathe – it’s just that it’s hard. If I couldn’t breathe I’d be dead.

What's goin' on with the weather?

We're nearly halfway through September and I'm sweating like a pig here at 2am because it's that hot. Pigs are well known for sweating don't you know.

Lost again

 

Porrrn

I spent all of Sunday downloading tons and tons of porn. I don't know why. I only watched a couple of minutes of each video (no jokes please). I ended up thinking that sex has got to be the oddest and funniest thing imaginable. But this is where I get really pervo. The best of the clips were of women peeing in public places. Eventually they took this to extremes and one woman started peeing into a plastic drinks container while sitting at a table at what was possibly a beer garden or something similar. The older woman next to her rather than say - "eeeeewwww - you're disgusting" just got up and walked away. She wouldn't have actually seen what was going on because all of this took place under the table but it was obvious what was going on. It was clear this was not the UK this activity was taking place. I wonder what my reaction would be if I saw this happening. Probably some Beavis and Butthead type laughter. I'll need to get out more often - maybe thios does take place all the time and I just miss it. These were the best of the porrrrn vids - even though there wasn't any sex involved.

My three blog readers (if there is still as many as three) have all decided to steer well clear of Peasie's blog from now on.

It's now the 5th September and it seems as though today and yesterday are the hottest days of the year. Maybe it's just my flat. The only cold place seems to be outside in the close (the bit between the entrance to the block of flats and the door to my flat). It is concrete. Maybe I'll go outside there and sit and pretend I've lost my key if anyone comes by.
Once I've taken the rubbish out I don't need to venture outside again today so I'll be stripping down to my boxers (a lovely image for you all).
The flats a mess. I keep on taking things out like camcorders etc (and there associated adapters and cables) and then not putting them back. Also, I think the dust in the flat may be beginning to affect my health. I've started wheezing a lot and finding it hard to breathe at night. Instead of cleaning the dust away I tend to just shift it from one place to another - I think I've already posted a picture of the thing I use to dust my flat.
I wish that yapping dog would just shut up.

ikea - it was an Ikea catalogue the woman threw at my window so it probably wouldn't have smashed it. I had one on my doorstep when I sent out today and saw several littered about the street. Either the person delivering them was just lazy or the crazy woman went about collecting them to throw at people's windows. This post will seem weird if you don't read things in the correct order. It is most people's tendency to read the post at the top first - but sometimes the post at the top will refer to an as yet unread thread further down.

Crazy woman with catalogue

I heard a commotion from outside my bedroom window so went to take a butchers and saw this woman ripping up a catalogue. I'd heard her earlier kicking the door to the next door block of flats. It isn't locked or anything - in fact I had to use it yesterday. Some git had locked the entrance to my block so I had to go in the next block, out their back door, in the back door to my block and then unlock the front door to my block.

I've no idea what the commotion was about. I did hear her screaming "You're just like your father".

So I stood at my bedroom window wearing just a pair of shorts as it's that feckin hot today and she notices me. She then comes over to my window and screams "what the fuck are you lookin at? Do you want a catalogue in all". (which I assume translates to - do you want some pages from ths catalogue I am ripping up and throwing about the street). So I says back to her "Oh shut up you stupid woman" but as I just spoke the words and my window was shut she would have heard them. She then proceeded to throw the catalogue in the general direction of my bedroom window - which would almost certainly have smashed as they are ancient and it was a thick catalogue. In fact, the fact it was a thick catalogue is probably why it didn't reach up to my window. I left her shouting profanities at me and came away from the window. I wish I still had my CCTV camera pointing out into the street. Maybe I'll go and set it up again. I hope she flips again. Nothing better than listening to a drunken crazy woman.

Funny smell

There is a funny smell emanating from me just now. It isn't an unwashed smell. It's kind of similar to when you have a bucket load to drink one night and the nextr day the drink seems to leak out every pore in your body. Only I didn't have a bucket load to drink last night.

Sister's wedding 2

My wee sister finally got married. She's been living with her now husband for about 11 years now I think. I hate weddings. I hate churches. I hate religion. But most of all I hate wedding receptions. I tried hard but I just couldn't get drunk. Eventually around midnight I started drinking vodka as well as my usual pints. I probably was drunk - I just didn't feel it. Damn - I can even remember walking home with one of my cousins.
I found out another of my cousins is gay. He's been married a few times and has three kids. I don't know any gay people. Well, I thought I didn't. I probably do know a few just don't know they're gay. I did find out about another person that's gay. Anyway, for me, finding out about my gay cousin was the highlight of the wedding reception. I found it hilarious. I don't mean to offend any gays by that comment. But when you don't know any gay people and then find out your own cousin is gay then you tend to find it funny. I had been thinking about my cousin recently because of Big Brother. He sounds just the same as Craig on that show. At the time I was thinking - just because he sounds effeminate doesn't necessarily mean he's gay (although Craig is). I was thinking my cousin sounds effeminate and he isn't gay......and now I find out he is after all.

Muddy path

Cycling home via the cycle path is enjoyable most nights - but not when it's been raining heavily. To get to the path I have to find my way through this. This is the view from the second fence I have to lift my bike over. There's still one more fence to go.

Sister's wedding

Getting more anxious as the day gets closer. I had said to myself a while back - I have no intention of carrying on with life if I'm still suffering from SA when I'm 40. But when my sister said she was getting married in August I could hardly top myself in May. But when her wedding's out of the way - there is nothing really to stop me from deciding at any point that I don't want any more part of this world. I've got my own life back to choose if I want to go on our not.
God - that was a depressing post. Guess the lack of sleep is making me depressed.

an ignorant git

Cycling home tonight I met a right ignorant git of an old woman. There is a path I cycle along which is not an actual cycle path. In fact there is a no cycling sign about a mile away at the start of this path.....but no such sign at the end of the path - the direction from where I was coming from. As a result of this any time I see people in front of me on the path I will move onto the grass at the side of the path out of their way. There is a bridge over a small stream so there is no grass for me to cycle on. Coming towards me were what looked like a woman with her mother pushing what I presume was her grandchild in a pushchair. They had a dog with them so I slowed down and in fact stopped and went by them pushing the bike along with my feet. The mother of the child said "sorry" to me as I went by as her dog had caused me to stop cycling. I could have continued but I put the safety of her dog first and wewnt slow. What annoyed me next was the gran pushing the chair in front of her snapped at me "well I'm not sorry - it's not a cycle path". Did she really have to say that? OK - at the moment it's not acycle path but North Ayrshire Council are keen to join this path up with another cycle path and so join up the whole region in a cycle path - this is the last part that doesn't have an official cycle path.
Getting back to this ignorant git - if I had accepted this was not an official cycle path - what was I to do. Get off my bike and walk this short distance. This would have meant me walking alongside my bike and so preventing her from walking across the bridge at the same time compared to me cycling and not taking up so much space.
When you read in the papers of old ladies being murdered for no apparent reason - well I wonder if they had just made some sarcastic remark to their murderer. If I didn't suffer from SA I would have given her abuse. Probably an old fart that's voted Tory all her life.

Semi Finals of a cup

The mighty Thitle have reached the semi final of a local cup competition. Up until about 14 years ago they had never even qualified for the knock-out (quarter final) stages. They've now qualified six times and reached the semi's once before. The team they will be playing in the semi final drew 5-5 last night before winning on penalties. 5-5.......you don't often see that sort of score these days. It does mean they are not too hot at the back so could this be the year we finally make the final of this competition. Well, tune in next week to find out.

Me in a kilt

I keep trying to post a picture but it's not coming up. Just as well as I'm an unshaven wreck in the picture.

Finally got the picture. My shoe laces are undone. I was only trying on the things to see if everything fitted as I would need to get things altered before Friday for the wedding on Saturday.

You could say I'm wearing th kilt like an Englishman but on Saturday I'll be like a true Scotsman.......and likely to be arrested because of it.

Are you calling me a butler?

Still unbeaten

This is the programme cover for this season. In the background you can see previous strips with the various sponsors. I think in the top right hand corner is a flag we got for winning the league in 2002 and the cup is for winning the league last season. Today was the opening day of the league season when the league flag was meant to be presented......but it was up to the clubs themselves to pay for a flag. As there was no presentation I assume they never bothered to pay for one.

It was a 1-1 draw today. God knows how we scraped a draw. What was funny was the ground was invaded by 40-50 extremely drunk people. I know 10 - 15 years ago I used to get drunk at the game and there used to be a group of us. Sometimes there would be a dozen of us and sometimes there were about 30. But we were never ALL drunk at the same time. Maybe one week one person would be drunk and he'd give it a miss the next week. Funnily enough - I never gave it a miss. But to have 40-50 of them arrive and ALL of them drunk was strange. They had been watching the Rangers v Celtic game on TV. Most of them were Rangers supporters but there were a few people with Irish tricolours draped over their backs. The police arrived with about 10 minutes to go and half of them scarpered. Thos that were left had their Buckfast poured out. There is a local bylaw which prevents drinking alcohol in a public place.

Mmmmmm

i ask this because im seriously considering a career in teahcing

I saw this on a forum just now and had to laugh. I hope the person who wrote it doesn't follow the link in my signature to this blog.
Lucky I caught my own typo before posting this.

More footie crap

Well we finished runners up in our section (unbeaten though). Which means we will have an away tie in ther quarter final. From a financial point of view this will be better as it will be against a club with a lot of supporters and the gate is shared - whereas had we had a home game it wouldn't have had the same crowd as the other team doesn't have many supporters.

Our oldest rivals finished bottom of the section with one draw and four defeats. In all my time of watching I don't recall this ever happening before (and I've been watching since 1977). So part of me is happy at that - but it still is one almighty fall from grace so to speak. Pissing down with rain all night - the game ended in darkness as we're not allowed to use floodlights. They are not powerful enough for a match to be played under - but are ok for training.

Cows are such shitebags

I just cycled near these cows and they started shiting themselves and ran away. Then when they realised there was a fence between them and me they got all brave and came back and started staring at me. What is this clown doing pointing that small metal box at me for? Even funnier if I had put it on flash. Then we'd have seen them panic.

Bidding on a book

I tried to get a book on Ebay some time back but lost out. The book came out in 1986 and I first heard about in in probably about 1992 or 1993 and have been after it ever since. I've got an earlier edition of the same book but I want this one. I'm not giving the name of the book as
a) I don't want anyone guessing my Ebay user id
b) I don't want anyone else bidding against me

It closes in about 9 hours time. I don't normalyl make any bids until the final minute of an auction but just in case I forget about this later on I'll make my bid now. I do know I can set up bid alerts - but they're not much use if I've fallen asleep.

So near and yet so far

What a boring cliché.
I thought we'd ended a quarter of a century hoodoo today by beating Kilwinning but our goal was chopped off in the final minute. A couple of shots off the bar. Completely outplayed them apart from a couple of short spells at the beginning of each half. Even our opponents knew they got out of jail today. A result would normally be accepted against our more illustrious opponents but there were a lot of disappointed face leaving the ground.
Barring a heavy defeat in out final game we should still qualify for the quarter finals. Although, it should be mentioned out worst defeat in recent years came against the team we now face. That season ended up being the biggest in the club's 100+ year history........but I don't want another 0-10 defeat.

Could do with another season like this one

Just looking at the goals scored this season (1957-58) and thinking we could do with that again. Especially a repeat of the result on December 14th. We play them tomorrow. We haven't won at their park since the 1979-80 season. A quarter of a fecking century. That run has got to come to an end soon. Problem is our two best defenders aren't available for tomorrow's game.

Dirty windows

Click on pic
This is a window in the workshop attached to the tiny office I work a couple of days a week. Scot is my oldest brother. 30th October 1976 he wrote his name on this dirty internal window and to this day it hasn't been cleaned off. My family took over this buiding in February 1970 so the dirt had no doubt been building up since then. There are four windows in this window frame. One of them is now smashed so there was no space for me to add my name. I did shove a sticker on the wooden frame on the 29th March 1983 and it is still there.

Jelly wobbler

Click for bigger picture

Saw this lying on the beach as I cycled home. Brought back some bad memories of being stung by one when young. And by the ned of the day my whole body was stinging as I must have been spreading the sting about. I think someone must have had the same idea as me as a child - pelting them with stones.

Dirty water

I never knew just how much water I must swallow while taking a shower. The other day I took a shower and the water was slightly discoloured. I do have a shower every day - I'm just getting round to posting now. So I thought, well, it's not that dirty - I can get away with showering in it - but I won't swallow any of the water. I then realised just how much water goes in my mouth.

My computer

This is my computers specifications. To think that a few years ago I was told that I would never need any more than 4GB. Jesus - I can download that in a few days. Click to see full size.

Man having a fit on a train

What happened on the train was we arrived in Stevenston (a few stops after I got on). One bloke wearing a baseball cap and cycling a bike got on. I was watching him closely because I am considering taking my bike on the train so I was keen to see where he put it. He never fully made it onto the train. I heard a muffled sound and then a noise from his mouth - a weird noise.
Now I don't have too high an opinion of the younger generation. Illustrated by about five minutes earlier two girls and a boy (about 12 years old or 13 at the very most) getting on the train. All three were smoking cigarettes. I thought they looked stupid at that age smoking. Then realised they shouldn't have been smoking in the train at all. But did I say anything to them. Of course not. Back to the guy having a fit. The first person to react was another 12/13 year old girl - but she didn't know what to do so she went and got a bloke in his early 20's to assist. He dragged the guy off the train which was due to pull out at any minute. I'm not particularly sure what you do with someone that is having a fit. I thought you were meant to just let them get on with it. This guy seem to be restraining him. Although to be fair he later just seemed to be holding the guy's head. All this time I was sat doing nothing. There was a man and woman slightly older than me and they also sat doing nothing. The next people to assist were the two chavettes and chavs that had earlier been smoking on the train. One of the chavettes got on her mobile phone to get an ambulance. Another young girl in her early 20's started going through they guy's jeans pockets. Presumably to find some identification or if there any simple instructions - what to do in case of etc etc. Then the guy appeared to fall asleep. The train driver and ticket inspector had now arrived. 20 or 30 minutes after this first started he suddenly woke up and wanted to get up. But they wouldn't let him till the ambulance arrived. The bloke that was sitting across from me then decided to get up and see what was happening. Because all the initial danger was over. My excuse, if you can call it that, was I suffer from bad Social Anxiety. I wonder what everyone else's excuse was. The only folk to help were chavs and chavettes and an early 20's bloke with long hair. God I hate folk with long hair. And he was good looking. I'd have "given him one" and I'm not even gay. Or maybe I am? Nah - I just want a pair of girls breasts for myself. He never did get the train. I dread to think what would have happened if he had taken a fit while cycling. Or maybe that's impossible - I don't know how fits work.

I was very conscious of people on the train on Sunday - especially if they were carrying rucksacks. I wasn't caring if they were "olive skinned" or not. If they were carrying anything I was suspicious.

downloading images from my camera

I've just tried putting the card into my computer and it was a piece of piss downloading all the pics quickly. Strangely, the pics look even better on the same monitor than they did with the previous computer. I think I'll need to install the cradle onto my new computer as I don't want to have to take the disc out each time.

I've got my new computer now

Just went up and got it this afternoon. I think I must have got it up and running by about 7:30pm. It's now 11:37pm and I've downloaded my first lesbian video. Couldn't wait any longer than 4 hours. It was meant to be a 400GB computer. But it's down to 361GB already. Still, that's a lot of lesbian videos I can fit in that space.

Aren't thumbs great?

Just been lying in bed thinking about how great thumbs are. Just think how often you use them. Tying your shoelaces.....holding a spoon or a fork or knife. Holding a screwdriver. It's much better than a willy - it doesn't have a mind of its own. God, how embarassing would that be? Sitting on a train and your thumb suddenly does erect. Looking like some stupid seventies kids tv presenter. Although if a thumb was used instead of a willy it could be handy. I could pee round corners and run away. Oh wait, I used to suck my thumb as a child. That's not right. Although it would be handy when I was older. Shit, when I was lying in my bed this was a serious thought to me - now look what's happened to it. I could write my name in the snow with greater accuracy than at present.

A thumb is only good when used in conjunction with your other fingers. What purpose would a willy serve if the thumb was to take over its functions. None - get rid of it. Bloody stupid looking thing anyway.

More pointlessness

This is a picture of one of the cupboard doors in my kitchen. I'll need to move on to door number three soon. Door number four doesn't exist anymore as it came off during one of my temper tantrums.

Talking to drunks

There's nothing worse than if you're sober having to make conversation with someone that's drunk.

I was walking out to the football today and halfway there I met my Uncle across the street. So I walked out the rest of the way with him. Had I walked out at my own pace I would have seen the kick off but because I had to wait on him......well, I didn't want to look an ignorant git, I missed the start. No problem there - I only saw the start of ONE home game all of last season but I've saw the start of both home games this season and was wanting to keep the run going. My uncle had been in the pub a little too long. God, now I know what people had to put up with when I was drunk. At least my uncle was speaking in English - unlike the drivel I talk that no-one can understand.

We won 5-1 and we now top our section.

Another five goals

Another win at home - this time 5-1. More players sent off.
Should be another win next Wednesday away from home - then it's the last two games which are the toughies. I reckon we could qualifty for the quarter finals. Something we are not known for over the years.
A lovely sunny day. So why do I feel miserable?

You say tomatoes, I say tomatoes

I've placed some coins here just to let you see the sixe of these tomatoes. My father brought me down some macaroni and cheese to the office where I was working and had these tomatoes. He grows them himself. Huge aren't they?
That was all the coins I had in my pocket.

It's just another manic Monday

As usual - click on the pic for bigger version
I'm getting depressed thinking about the happy times I spent in this hotel. You'll have to read the rest of the blog - there was a hotel here and it's now been knocked down.
This place opened half an hour earlier than other pubs on a Sunday. I had a system whereby if I heard "Manic Monday" by the Bangles I would get legless because it contained the words "it's just another manic Monday, I wish it was Sunday, that's my fun day". It was on the jukebox in the pub so there was a fair chance it would be played (especially by me if truth be told). I wish I could go back in time to those days. There are a few things I'd like to change. A few mistakes I'd like to correct. A few things I should have done but didn't.

Stop the world - I want to get off. Any chicken left me-luv-pandas. I have no real desire to waken up in the mornings any more.

Cipramil

I think I'll need to go back to the docs and get myself back onto Cipramil. I hadn't really been depressed much lately but it's just hit me like a ton of bricks. I only get depressed when I think about my life so I avoid thinking about my life.....in fact I just avoid thinking altogether. But lately I've just been thinking - what the fuck is the point? I mean, I've been living in this flat for 16 years now and have achieved nothing in all that time. Nothing has changed. Everyone I grew up with has moved on with their lives. Got married, had kids, got divorced, killed their neighbours. But what have I done. Sweet Fuck All.

And the beat goes on.

New season starts

What a great way to start the season - by humping your oldest rivals 5-0. A player sent off, again, in fact - it was the same player sent off in Saturday's friendly, as well as a penalty missed. Life is good. Apart from my computer finally died last night.

Update : bloody typical. There's six teams in our section which means three games each afternoon or night the games are played. So what were the other two results.......5-0 and 6-0 (the team that won 5-0 is below us in the alphabet so they go above us in the league table).

You may wonder why I don't mention any of the club names - well, I don't want someone Googling their club's name and finding this blog. One of the teams we play, the last game in our section, we haven't won on their ground since the 1979-80 season. Over a quarter of century. I think it's time we ended this run of failure.

The new football season

The season officially begins tomorrow night with our first game in the sectional league cup. This is organised in geographically local groups (4 groups of 6 clubs). Which means our first game is againt our oldest rivals. They are actually in the league below us.......this is the first time in our history we have started the season in a higher division than them. We beat them twice in this cup last season (3-0 at home and 6-3 away.......this was the first time we had scored more than 5 goals against them in one game since the 1950's). So we will start this game as favourites to win. I don't really care about this cup. I can't see us qualifying (the top two qualify) - but if we beat our rivals I'll be happy.

Last season had a strange situation. The way the quarter finals were drawn we went into our last game of the league section knowing that a win would mean our quarter final tie was away from home to the runners up of the section. So both clubs in that final game were determined not to win. Even got to the stage of one club missing a penalty. But we eventually won by a late goal. The player was sacked. Only joking. I think we got humped 6-1 against the same club in the quarter final.

Usually, at the start of the season the club is in dire straits. There is usually no committee, no money, hardly any players have re-signed. But this season almost all the players have now signed, we've got a better goalkeeper (he also lives in the town - plus another local player looks as though he will be signing up for another stint at the club). There is a few more on the committee. The ground looks a little bit better. There is now an anti-climb grease on top of the fencing round the ground to keep supporters from escaping. There is still a lack of money - but we can't have everything. We get a flag for winning the leage the previous season - unfortuinately, we have to pay for the flag ourselves.

Nowhere is safe from clutter

Click on the picture for larger size

Even my kitchen is full of junk. A bag of marbles. A radio (tuned to Westsound and only used between 2pm and 6pm on Saturday's - even if I'm not in the flat).

Weird dream

I had this really strange dream that I was in car with my gran and grandpa. Both of them are now dead. I've been in a car with my grandpa many times before, he was driving up until he was nearly 90 (and that was usually the speed as well), but I can't recall ever being in a car with my gran. On the radio was someone doing a cover version of Dido's Life for rent....but it was being sung in french. Also strange was the fan blowing air around the car was really blasting air out and I didn't know how to switch it off.

It's light outside

Great (he says sarcastically), it's light outside. I'm still struggling with this VAT return and it is now light outside. So it looks like I'm going to get no sleep before I start the new day. BOALAX.

CMOS/GPNV Checksum Bad

CMOS/GPNV Checksum Bad
Now, what the hell does that gibberish mean. Although, at least it's kind enough to say it's "bad". No fucking Sherlock - the fact it takes 100 attempts at switching the computer on tells me it's bad. I want to know WHAT is bad.

Fat Bastard

I know someone that's bid on a Fat Bastard on Ebay. I was soooooooooooooooooooo tempted to sneak in and outbid them just for a laugh. Actually, given what it's wearing I reckon it looks quite like me. Maybe I should outbid them after all. I think it closes in about 8 hours time. I should be doing a VAT return just now (it was due in yesterday so given the post it will be a few days late) instead of looking at Ebay. God it's after 4am and I'm shattered.